Maggie, Author at From Cave Walls

Lazy Days

Life in the mountains can be so relaxing – okay, some people say they are lazy days. I’m not sure if that is true, but sometimes I just enjoy looking out the window (lovingly referred to as our ‘outdoor tv’) and observing nature.

On this day I was watching the birds dart in and out of the bird feeders. The hummingbirds were doing their long sweeps through the air trying to ward off other hummingbirds. In the midst of all this activity, I noticed a rabbit had settled himself at the bottom of the feeder and made dinner out of the sprigs of greenery that grew at the bottom of the bird-feeder pole.

I always try to have my phone nearby – especially since I missed the chance to capture the bobcat that wandered through the yard. I picked it up to snap of quick video when the rabbit got up from his crouched feeding position and stretched oh so beautifully! I just love it when you are in the right place at the right time.

Don’t you?

All my short videos will be on my YouTube Channel – From Cave Walls. – Enjoy!

Relaxed – not lazy I say!

When You Feel Alone

It was a melancholy day – you know the kind when you feel alone even though there are hundreds of people around you? Well, that’s the kind of day. It was rainy and cool and I ducked into my local big box warehouse store to just waste a little time. I found myself wandering from one sample station to the next, aimlessly eating brownies and hummus and cheese without really tasting any of it.

“I love your hair colors.” I looked up to see a woman who appeared to be about 15 years older than me. I smiled and said thank you.

Kahlil Gibran Quote “Why blue and purple?” Her look was quizzical but not judgemental. I told her the stories about my sisters and how these were their favorite colors and they made me happy. She nodded as if she understood everything. I talked about how tough it was to go on without them and yet, somehow I knew I had to live and enjoy the life that had been taken from them.

This sweet woman with curly gray hair, told me how she had lost her mother, her husband and her dog all in one year. I could tell it had been so very hard on her. We talked at length and she told me about how hard her husband had fought to overcome a devastating illness. But, on Thanksgiving morning, they were together in the kitchen and he collapsed with a heart attack and died.

We talked about love and about what we do when we feel alone. We each had our own method of finding joy and I shared my love of my grandchildren and the great joy they bring me. She smiled and nodded and talked about how many children and grandchildren she had – they were a great comfort to her. She even confessed she liked serving little tidbits of food to strangers to help ease the feeling of loneliness.

When I left the store that day I was no longer feeling melancholy. Instead I felt gifted. Two strangers met, talked and relieved a little heaviness off the shoulders of the other. I never once considered how this crazy blue and purple hair would enrich my life so much. But you know what? I bet my sisters knew.

They are sneaky like that!

Missing Your Parents

I was standing in line at the store waiting to check out. The young lady at the register looked up, smiled and said “I like your hair.” That’s usually how it starts. I have found that in most cases people under 40 or over 60 are most likely to comment about the color of my hair. The conversations that follow are most frequently about loss of a loved one.

“Thank you. The color is for my two sisters I lost to cancer.” The expression changes and the instant apology almost always follows

“I’m so sorry”, she replied.

“It’s okay, it makes me happy. It’s the way I choose to keep them with me every day. I look in the mirror and I see them and it always makes me smile.” At that point her reaction changes from somber to more light-hearted when she realizes she has not offended me.

No one was in line behind me so we engaged in a short conversation. She tells me she lost both her parents.

“Oh, I’m sorry – you’re so young!”

As we talk, I learn she is in her early thirties. That’s young to lose your parents. I was only 19 when my mother passed away. She explains the losses were due to heart disease and emphysema. It is a magical moment when this young woman tells me how she keeps her parents with her. Her father was a musician and she loves to listen to gospel music because it reminds her of him. Her mother loved to cook and she spends time trying all her mom’s recipes. We smile at the end of our short exchange, each of us acknowledging a lighter feeling knowing we have shared something important to us with a perfect stranger.

I have a theory that we can connect with one another much easier when we find something we have in common – even if it is something like the loss of someone we loved dearly. It is so healing – especially in these current times – to share our stories. To look someone in the eyes and connect. To speak and to listen to one another is one of our greatest gifts as human beings.

We just need to exercise those gifts more frequently.

Gems and Minerals

Now that I am retired, I am able to take my love of gems and minerals to the next level. At first, I started by making beaded jewelry, buying cabochons, gemstones and trying my best to weave them together into something I loved. It was fun and I learned a lot, but after a while, it became less satisfying for me. Then I enrolled in some silversmith classes and found I loved working with metal! Again, a great learning experience, but work and life can get in the way and as much as I loved what I was doing, there was no time for it to be anything but a hobby.

Along the way I started buying slabs of minerals or rock samples. Each one a little more interesting than the last and I dreamed of polishing each one and setting them into my own creations. Fortunately, we retired into an area rich in opportunities for artists or enthusiastic hobbyists – I’m not quite sure which category I will end up in.

Samples of cabochons Before much time passed, I began taking Lapidary classes at a local arts and crafts school. Then came my road trips to attend gem and mineral shows. I learned a lot about minerals but not near enough. The next logical step was to join the local gem and mineral society. What a great group of like-minded individuals. Now this is how retirement is supposed to be!!

As I travel these hills, my husband and I find time to attend artist studio tours. It’s always inspiring to walk into an artist’s creative space. We have met some really talented artists in every medium imaginable. One well known jeweler teaches amazing silver smith classes in her studio – yes – you guessed it! I signed up!

This space will be a place to share my creative experiences. What works, what didn’t work – maybe even what I plan to attempt next.

Blue and Purple Hair

From Cave Walls Maggie These are my hair stories. People often ask me why I color my hair blue and purple. There is a reason – a very personal reason. I lost my two sisters to cancer. It’s funny growing up, at some point you realize you will most likely lose your parents, but we never think about losing our siblings. Sure, as we get older it becomes more of a reality, but it is tough when it happens.

I lost my mother when I was 19. My father when I was 38. When I lost my sisters after 56 and 62 years respectively, I realized they had been in my life longer than either of my parents. The loss was devastating. It was hard to imagine my life without either of them. That was the moment I decided to honor them by keeping them close to me. Their favorite colors were blue and purple, so I went to the salon and had blue and purple streaks added to my gray hair.

Now wherever I go, they are with me.

Grief Unites Us

Many people compliment me on my hair. I am always happy to tell people why I do it and that it makes me happy. What I did not expect was the comfort it gives others to share their stories of grief with me. I never realized just how many of us have stories that we hold tight and never share. That’s a shame. When others feel comfortable enough to tell me about their own loss and how it has impacted them, we build a small bridge and we both heal a little.

Here in this space, I will share some of these stories. Most are about grief, but not all. I am fondly referring to them as ‘Hair Stories’.

In honor of my sisters: Rosie and BJ. I love you to the moon and back again.

The Squirrel and the Chipmunk

I love watching the animals interact outside my windows. We have had bears, a cougar, turkeys, deer, beautiful birds, rabbits, and of course chipmunks and squirrels. On this day, I was so amused by the jockeying for position between a squirrel and a chipmunk a third its size. So amused that I decided I needed to edit the video and add some music.

All my short videos will be on my YouTube Channel – From Cave Walls. – Enjoy!

Every day is a new adventure.

Mountain Life

A year ago I started a new life as a retired person in the foothills of North Carolina. My roots are in these mountains and I guess I always knew I would return here some day. Strong roots hold you tight when you spread your wings in exploration. I knew there was more, and I found it, and now find myself craving less.

Less people. Less conflict. Less drama. Less traffic. Less worry. Less demands. This is mountain life.

I don’t know what it is that pulls us back to familiar places, but the urge can be extremely powerful. There is something very tactile about our roots. The smells, the ground, the feel of a familiar place satisfies some primal need inside of me. I realized long ago that not every person has this pull. It surprised me, but as I got older I began to understand it more.

When I grew up, the land was everything. Your roots, your shelter, your community, your spirituality, your memories, your food – your entire being. We planted a garden and shared that food anytime someone needed it. We came together as families and as a community. We celebrated the small things as much as the big things. We walked more than we rode. We laughed more than we cried. And we leaned on each other in ways a lot of people never experience.

Of course every life is made up of a complex mix of good times and bad times. Our ability to remember more of the good than the bad is a testament to survival and helps us keep the memories alive. The good memories especially. I have a favorite movie – The Trip to Bountiful. Most people have never heard of it even though Geraldine Page was nominated and awarded an Oscar for her portrayal of Mrs. Watts. I have watched it several times and it always brings me to tears. This movie portrays all that I feel about my roots in these mountains.

Part of this retired life is also a quest to document my family genealogy. I want my children, my grandchildren and my great-grandchildren to understand where they come from and the people that paved the way for the life that they have inherited.

I’ll do some blogging here, but I also have a blog on Google Blogger which explains how and why I approach this phase of my life the way that I do. You can pop over and read about my journey by clicking here. I’ll be blogging in both places from time to time, so be sure to check back often to see what I’ve been up to.